Romans 7:20. Says “Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me but does it.”
I think of this whenever I do something stupid. Whenever I am beating myself up for something that I did with the best of intentions but didn’t finish. Or even for those things that I do which I misunderstood.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions, so they say. I tend to find myself but I do things being naïve and innocent that others don’t see that way. Perhaps it’s because of how much life has evolved with technology and all. And I just haven’t really kept up.
I want more than anything to inspire others. Through both words and deeds, through struggles and triumphs. I count my blessings every day. Especially on those days that aren’t so good.
I am looking at my almost 6-month-old daughter, writing this while she nurses. Thinking of how tired I am. How fuzzy my mind has been lately. She doesn’t sleep well. Not even a little while.I Compass is a blessing because it allows me time to read and to study some of those things that I might not have time for otherwise. But I fear it also makes me smile be sometimes. I may read something truly inspires me but forget where it came from. It’s in my head, I love the thought of the idea. I could’ve written it myself.
I think times it’s leaving a telephone in the refrigerator. Or forgetting to make those eggs for my son even though he’s asked three times. Most days it’s forgetting to brush my hair. I think God for ponytails and buns. Lol
But as I contemplate how far I’ve come with blogging and how far still have to go I realize that there are things that I need to revisit. There are things that perhaps don’t make me lazy or disorganized but certainly do not help me to be a better witness for Christ.
I remember that I have power given by God himself, within me. He has already overcome the world and I need to remember the truth and planted deep within my heart and my mind. I need to remember that there is always room to grow. There is always more to experience and develop.
I only wish to fulfill God’s purpose and plan for my life. I appreciate how honest Paul was in saying that if he does what he does not want to do, It is not I who do it soon living in me.
Bold honesty. And repentance. I like to begin each day with both of those things. Honesty and repentance toward God. Because really anytime I mess up, The first thing that comes to mind is not what others think of me but what they think of my Jesus?
There is a plan and a purpose. There is a need to grow, to have a sincerely honest and teachable and meek spirit about us so that God can work in us and through us.